My roommate is too noisy when she’s having sex

Dear Pastor,

I am 22 years old and I am sharing a house with a woman who is 25 years old. There is one bathroom that both of us share. She is not very tidy.

She takes her bath, but she does not always wash out the shower, and I have to use it. We always fuss about it. Sometimes her man comes and spends the night with her. That is not my business, but the walls in these apartments are very thin and whenever they are having sex I know, because she cannot keep quiet. Everything that she is doing to him or he is doing to her, I can hear.

I talked to her about it and we laughed. They have started to play music when they are having sex. The guy loves reggae, but in order for me not to hear them, they turn up the music loud. But that also disturbs me. It is not fair to me because I am paying half the rent.

When my boyfriend is here, if we are having sex, we are very quiet about it. This apartment is for $30,000 per month. I spoke to her again about it and she said I should move. I do not want to move because I love living here.

I am writing to you because I know she reads your column, and I am hoping that she would see the letter and read your response. Why do some women make so much noise when they are having sex? I enjoy sex, but I do not make noise.

N.M.

Dear N.M.,

You young women are in your 20s and both of you have boyfriends; you should try to live in peace with each other and to cooperate. Your sharing partner should understand that the place should be always kept clean, there shouldn't be any argument. I understand that when people are sharing the bathroom it is a big issue. Perhaps some tenants cooperate with each other and some don't, but try your best not to make big issues about it.

Concerning the disturbance during sex. It's a pity this woman believes that you don't have any right to talk, and they can carry on and not be considerate. You're not the only person who has spoken to me about this problem in some apartments. I would say to you that at least the young woman with whom you are sharing facilities tries to avoid disturbing you by turning on the music while she and her man are romping. But it has made matters worse, and you find it very difficult to enjoy any sort of quietness. When you complained further, she suggested that you move out. Frankly, if you were able to find another place with similar facilities, you probably should move and make sure that those with whom you share facilities would cooperate.

In the meantime, you may consider purchasing some earplugs that would keep out the noise of your roommate when her man is around.

Pastor