Low-life men keep using me

Dear Pastor,

I am 20 years old and I am very ambitious. I graduated from high school with honours and awards. I am currently attending college.

I am not a streetwalker and I fear the Lord greatly. I carry myself with morals and respect and yet still, I cannot find a decent man.

I've been used twice by low-life men who were seeking papers from me, but never got them. I was taken advantage of by a friend who claimed he always had 'feelings' towards me, when in fact, I was the rebound of his recent break-up.

All three of these men have verbally expressed to me that I am a good woman, but in the end, I was either used, cheated on, lied to, or dumped.

I feel discouraged and left out because out of my handful of friends, I am the only one not in a relationship. I also feel rejected and lonely.

My mother insists that I wait on God to send me a partner in His perfect timing. Should I change who I am as a person, or should I wait like my mother told me?

K.H.

Dear K.H.,

Your mother is correct. Men are going to continue to use you if you are over anxious and give into their lies and trickery.

It is taking you too long to learn that most men are liars and some men will do anything to get under your skirt.

But hear me now, you are old enough and you have experienced the wicked hands of some men. So don't be fooled by sweet talking men.

Weigh whatever they say to you carefully before you give in to them.

You say that one has even tried to use you to get his papers; I am sure you mean his permanent status.

You are a pretty girl and men would always see you and love you, but put this matter before God, work hard, and in God's own time, he will give you a partner. You say that you are lonely. I must make this suggestion to you. Go back to school; keep active and that would help you to fight loneliness. Find an organisation and volunteer to help them. Spend much time in prayer. Become active in young people's work. You are a good woman; don't condemn yourself for the mistakes you have made. But learn from these mistakes. Be assured of my prayers.

Pastor