Sleeping with my cousin

Dear Pastor,

I really need your help on this matter. I will be 14 years old soon. I have a boyfriend whose birthday will be on March 16; so you see, we have something in common.

He is much older than I. I am so much in love with this guy, but my family doesn't like him because they say he cannot help me in any way, except to give me sex.

He doesn't give me money, but I don't care. I know he has his eight children to care for. He has a job. I went to his workplace one day and we had sex and since then, I have to hide and go there at nights; but I have stopped.

It's not about the sex. He is very understanding, and we spend hours on the phone at nights and in the day.

I am sure that it's me alone he has because we are always talking. I love this guy. It started out as a family talk, as he is my cousin, but now we are lovers and I don't plan to leave him.

My mother beats me if anyone tells her anything about him and me. I am going to run away and live with him when he comes back from the USA. He is going away soon.

Pastor, please tell me what to do because you are my only help. I am so in love with my cousin and I can't help it.

S.S.

Dear S.S.,

You make me feel very sad because you are only 13 and you are behaving as if you are an adult.

You are sexually active with a man who is by far your senior, and he is also your cousin. He is a paedophile. He should be in prison. He ought to know better.

He has given you the impression that he cares about you, but nothing could be further from the truth.

He is a very wicked man. He wouldn't want any of his underage daughters to become sexually involved with a man.

I feel sad because you think very highly of him and you called the feelings that you feel 'love'. This is not love, it is abuse. You have to learn to listen to your mother and end the relationship with this man.

Please, please, do not run away and go to visit this man or sneak out of your parents' house to visit him. You cannot consent. The age of consent is 16.

Focus on your schoolwork. Let me hear from you again.

My numbers are 876-877-1009 or 876-929-1667.

Pastor